


Time Off

by awgaskarth0805



Category: All Time Low (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:00:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26574886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awgaskarth0805/pseuds/awgaskarth0805
Summary: Alex has trouble adjusting to life at home after a successful tour.
Kudos: 1





	Time Off

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place in the Nothing Personal album cycle!

“Alex, you do realize how late it is, right? It’s, like, one thirty in the morning, we should both really get to sleep,” Alex heard Jack say through his phone.  
“Oh, I didn’t even realize, I guess you’re right. Well, hopefully we can do some songwriting soon like we talked about, that would be really fun!” Alex exclaimed, showing how wide awake he was.  
“Sure, we can plan that in the near future. Sleep well, dude, maybe I’ll stop by yours and Rian’s place sometime tomorrow, but I did promise my parents that I’d spend some time with them,”  
“Sounds good, talk to you later, Jack,”   
Alex hung up his phone, and laid in his bed, putting the phone beside him. All Time Low had been off tour over the last week, for the first time in months. They had two months off, and in their last days of their previous tour, they all talked about how they were excited for some time off to recharge and see friends and family.   
Alex had been looking forward to all of this, but now that it was actually happening, it felt weird. He’d stayed up super late, on the phone with friends or family members, every night since getting back to Baltimore, unable to shut off his mind and get some sleep.   
Rian, on the other hand, seemed to really be enjoying his time off, and Alex was a bit jealous of how unaffected his friend seemed to be from this transition of life on the road, to life at home. Alex wasn’t sure what was wrong with him, but he couldn’t help but feel a dark cloud hanging over him if he wasn’t diligently working on something or talking to someone.   
Taking a deep breath, Alex tried to get comfortable in his bed before shutting his eyes, but he couldn’t get his mind to calm down. After tossing and turning for a bit, Alex decided to get up and make something in the kitchen, hoping that a snack would make him feel drowsy enough to fall asleep.   
He got up and made his way into the kitchen as quietly as he could, not wanting to disturb Rian, who was probably already asleep. After turning on the lights, Alex began to rummage through the cabinets, eventually deciding on making some tea and microwave popcorn. He heated up the water for his tea, before putting the popcorn in the microwave.  
“Oh shit!” Alex said to himself once the popcorn started to pop.   
He was surprised at how loud this was in his silent house, compared to on the tour bus when everyone was up and making noise, drowning out the popping entirely. Alex took out the bag once it was done and poured its contents into a bowl.   
As he turned around to go back to his room, Rian walked into the kitchen.  
“Hey, Rian, I didn’t expect you to be up right now? Why’re you awake right now?” Alex asked, as Rian filled up a water bottle.  
“Well, I was watching a show, and the time got away from me. You actually look really exhausted, why’re you up making popcorn this late?” Rian continued.  
“I couldn’t sleep, but it’s fine, I’ve been okay for the rest of the week so far,”   
“Wait, have you not been sleeping enough every night this week?” Rian continued, starting to sound concerned for his friend.  
“Well, no, but it’s okay,”   
Alex faked a smile, hoping that Rian would buy it.  
“Alex, are you okay, man? now that I’m thinking about it, you haven’t really been acting like yourself since we got back from tour,”  
“It’s kind of hard to explain, we don’t have to talk about this right now, like, you probably want to get some sleep,”  
“Well, now that I know something’s up, I’m going to have a hard time falling asleep. Let’s go out to the living room, and just talk for a bit. I don’t have to be up early tomorrow, so it’s no big deal,” Rian offered.  
“Okay, let’s do that. Besides, I need someone to eat half of this popcorn, I didn’t expect so much to come out of that bag,”   
The two of them made their way out to the living room and sat on opposite sides of the couch, putting the bowl of popcorn in between them.  
“So, what’s going on, man?” Rian started, eating some of the popcorn.  
“I think the easy way of saying it, is that I miss tour,”  
“Well, I do, too, but I’m not losing sleep over it. Also, it’s not like this was our first ever tour, what makes this one so different?”  
“I don’t know, this was one of the biggest tours we’ve ever done, and the emotional high I got after every show was intense, and I miss that feeling,” Alex explained.  
“Well, I don’t think there’s a lot we can do at home to get you to that same level, but I bet we can go out with friends more, and that it would help some,” Rian suggested.  
“I think that would help, but I think it’s more than just the dopamine and serotonin from performing. This album cycle was easily our most successful so far, and we sold out so many venues across the country. We met so many amazing fans, some of which told us about how much our music has helped them through things in their lives, and that really struck something in me. It made me feel like people really needed me, and a bit of the emotional high I’d get were from those interactions,”  
“All of that makes sense. Maybe you should go through your Twitter mentions more, I bet you’d find a bunch of people saying some of that same stuff,”   
“Well, that’s sort of true, but Twitter can be a bit weird. Like, I can go on there in search of that kind of stuff, but then find a hate thread or some other negative thing instead. I did that on the road some, but meeting people in real life would almost cancel out how seeing that stuff on Twitter would make me feel. Either way, it’s much more enjoyable to talk to fans in person, and I guess I just feel kind of empty without it all,”  
“I get what you’re saying, and I’m sure that Zack and Jack would, too, and I think it’s good that we’re talking about this now. We’re, hopefully, going to get to tour and be in this band for a long time, and feeling this way after every tour would be really bad for you, especially as we continue to expand. I think having some distractions is a good way to deal with how you’re feeling, but you can’t be actively doing something for every single second of every single day,” Rian stated, looking at his friend.  
“You’re right, and I’ve been trying to distract myself. I’ve been talking with people more, in real life and on the phone. That’s actually why I’ve not been sleeping, I’ve been calling people until really late at night, and talking with them to get out of my own head. I talked to Jack right before coming out here and getting the popcorn. I need a way to shut my mind off when I can’t be distracted by something, but I don’t know how to do that,”  
“Well, a good place to start might be trying to think about how excited you are for the next tour. Like, instead of getting sad about missing tour, use that energy to get excited for the next time we’re on the road. I bet that will make tour feel even more exciting and rewarding than it already does. That being said, try to enjoy the little amount of time off that we get in between tours. Like, we only get a few months at home every year, and while it’s not as fun as being on tour, it’s so important to rest, so the next tour can be even better than the last one,”  
“That’s a really good way to look at it. I guess feeling needed by people in the way the fans say they do kind of got to my head. I shouldn’t let this be the only thing that makes me feel fulfilled, and I think our last tour made that happen for me so much, that it became a really big deal in my head,” Alex continued.  
“That’s not surprising, especially since you probably hear that sentiment more than the other three of us, since you write the lyrics and everything. It’s great that the fans have such a special place in your heart, but it shouldn’t just be them,”  
“You’re so right about all of this. Thank you for saying all of these things. Sorry for keeping you up to talk about this,”  
“It’s okay, I couldn’t sleep anyway. I’m just glad I could help some. Do you think you’re going to be okay?” Rian asked.  
“Yeah, I think so. This was a good step in the right direction. I might say out here and watch a movie or something, since I’m still not tired,” Alex stated.  
“I’ll stay out here, too, if you’re cool with that. I feel pretty alert still, too, and we still have quite a bit of popcorn left to finish,” Rian pointed out, making them both laugh some.  
“You’re not wrong! Let’s watch something!” Alex exclaimed, grabbing the remote.   
As he started to channel surf, he felt grateful for the conversation he’d just shared with Rian and was hopeful that his mind would now start to move into a happier place.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I got the idea for this from a quote prompt! I'm still finding new ideas almost daily, but would love some requests! If you have a specific story you want written, please send it my way!! Thank you all for reading, it really does mean the world. Lots of love, Liv.


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